with every passing moment it just keeps getting worse

Tue, 12 Apr 2005 22:24:02 GMT

brilliant_pain

my new eljay, add me thatd be pretty tite

everything is so cool like i dont even know ha

new band=awsome

hmmm anyone remember buttsex the pirate
yeah

ill leave this jounral with some lyrics

</span> You said so much without even parting your lips
It's past 3 am and I'm still far from sleep
This is a habit that I can't break
You're my only company
I'm skipping stones down a south surburban street

She keeps on asking "do you think it hurts much to die"
"It's hurting so much more to stay alive now"
She's gonna find out how much it hurts to die
She laced her perfume up with death
Feel it in my lungs
so I'll pull in the deepest breath
and drop my head

and...

Nothing hurts my world,
just affects the ones around me
When sin's deep in my blood,
you'll be the one to fall.

cant forget these..
this is a call to arms for all who recognize romance as
as a dying scene
who'll take it to their graves
this is a call to arms for all who hold this sacrament close
may our hearts burn on
I'll sing for you the thernody of modern romance
this is a call to arms for all who recognize romance as
as a dying scene
who'll take it to their graves
this is a call to arms for all who hold this sacrament close
may our hearts burn on

o and some dashboard sicne im such a sceneXcore hXc emo kid right haha
Now that i can see you..
I dont think your worth a second glance.

yup:)

Thu, 07 Apr 2005 19:24:22 GMT

this is ghey

im done with eljay

or this one at least

everyone think im in shambles or sumthing

but i really coundlnt give less of a shit

and i cant think of anything i did to deserve all those people yelling at me hm i got better things to worry about anyway
cool

c ya

Nothing short of invinceable....

Wed, 06 Apr 2005 20:41:42 GMT

haha i love how i made a really long entry and i accidently deleted it

yeah so i decided im not making a new journal just because someone passed around a link to an entry i made when i was upset, and apparenlty i deserve like 10 people yelling at me? hmm alright makes perfect sense. im not upset anymore infact i was more upset before it happend

Its so beutifull out today, were have all the days gone, it seems like just yestrday we were all freezing our asses off outside california tortilla in olney, and now the sun is beating down on our heads with 80 degress. winter is defently over, and i wont miss a minute of it. i love spring, almost as much as i love autumn, the perfect moments, sitting out on my roof thinking, no one can find me there, its perfect, but spring, i love it, school becomes so chill, its amazing, school in the spring is so great, i love it, infact i love school, i just do, i dont know, sleeping thru math makes me smile, then getting to walk into health class, seeing jen and and that girl who i cant remember her name, sitting there, and then 5 minutes after class starts jake walks in, shakes my hand, and yell at ppl for sitting in the "wrong seats", what a crazy kid, then guitar, just sitting down and looking at kyle for a second and he just says "..........nipple" and i laugh my ass off everytime, he says it everyday, and i laugh, it will never get old. and nsl, i love mr nutter just doesnt give a shit, and thats another class with jake, so u no its a party, and lunch, lunch has been amazing, i love being able to go outside at lunch, and going to 7-11, but today we didnt go, cuz bob was waching the exit to the road, but when me and lacey were coming back, we ran into franky fucking mackamera, most awsome kid i ever met, this kid does up to indian or white girls and says "hola chicas, u r muy caliente..............wait ur spanish right?" its so funny, wht an awsome kid. and english wow, i love it, me, mellisa, jayare, pat, and rachel like formed a clique, were so hXc, i gave tidre my roca wear belt buckle today, cuz hes so gangsta, then my belt was on my bag, and everyong looked at ity in awe of how skiny i am lol then biology is really funny, dustin is such a perv. today i feel so great, and i know tomorow will be even better, im really suprised, getting over took less than 2 days. wow

Wed, 06 Apr 2005 18:31:46 GMT

yeah today, again, lunch was awsome, i slid and tried to trip mellisa, not really reying to, just cuz it was sumthin to do, but yeah, then the rest of the day was ordinary, guitar chris and kyle started a "band" called the carnaocolgist. fucking cant spell that, hmm yeah it as really funny. o health was cool, i think im trying to remember while i type........................no i cant remember lol hmm so im trying to have band practice saturday, but i want to have 2 guitarists there, not just me. should be cool stuff. fuck i want some pizza so yeah bye

hm so i wonder how all these people who dont like me for writing wht i think/feel in MY journnal found it, but afterall, i did so many awfull things to deserve comments from a bunch of people i dont know, thank you so muchhhhh

makes me think...

so new journal

IM me for it

or dont

i could be hXc and pass it out to everyone

EDIT!!!

haha i gave my rockawear belt buckle to tidre today, wht a crazy kid, but im goin to olney this weekend, so i can just steal another one from tjmaxx, god im such a clepto i dont think ive ever gone to a store or mall or olney without stealing somthing.

Wed, 06 Apr 2005 00:35:25 GMT

i thought today was gunna be better, i felt really good at the end of school, i guess hearing shit about um shit, i love whn i use shit twice in one sentence, but days like today, i wish i could turn every bottle in my house upside-down, but im not a retard. one good thing has come out of today

everything that made me miserable is gone

all those people, gone, i never have to see them again, they got kicked out, it was awsome, i got home from school and there were like 20 suitcases on my front porch, my parents decided to kick all those people out. finally.

and yeah, now i no evetnually i wont be miserable about..........shit

on the lighter side of shit

me and pat

WhothehellisPatN: gimme a question about me that would end in multiple choice
BleedingHart187: pats penis is......?
WhothehellisPatN: no
WhothehellisPatN: haha but serioulsy
BleedingHart187: pats penis was.......?
WhothehellisPatN: no
WhothehellisPatN: damn it harry
BleedingHart187: harry and pat are not.......? and the answer is hermafodite hookersss
WhothehellisPatN: haha no way
BleedingHart187: pat played basketball against a black person?
WhothehellisPatN: and wooped his ass to damn it
BleedingHart187: thats racist
BleedingHart187: /!!!!!!!
BleedingHart187: how do u feel about that
BleedingHart187: ?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!!?dfljsklfwsfa
WhothehellisPatN: i feel pretty :-D
BleedingHart187: haha no way u r so posse
BleedingHart187: infact
BleedingHart187: to possee this relationship is over8-)
WhothehellisPatN: w.e harry
WhothehellisPatN: u no u cant survive without me
BleedingHart187: possee=positive thinking
BleedingHart187: i no
BleedingHart187: u make me complete, every moment im with you is bliss but deep down i hate you so much i might slip a piss on ur drums
WhothehellisPatN: haha me too
WhothehellisPatN: i already did 2 times actually
BleedingHart187: 3 times the charm
WhothehellisPatN: no way
WhothehellisPatN: that jinxes it
BleedingHart187: o alright
BleedingHart187: i guess i owe u a coke
WhothehellisPatN: damn right
BleedingHart187: dude i had in-n-out today
WhothehellisPatN: kool
BleedingHart187: omg its like sex in the mouth
BleedingHart187: sike it tastes like 7-11 stuff only its more expensive
WhothehellisPatN: haha
BleedingHart187: im putting this in my eljay cuz i got nuthing to say
WhothehellisPatN: ?
WhothehellisPatN: whatrs goign in ur eljay
BleedingHart187: in the eljay...
BleedingHart187: this conversation
WhothehellisPatN: o w.e
BleedingHart187: its almost like were on tv
WhothehellisPatN: its almost like were on shutup
BleedingHart187: only everyone looks at it and thinks im complaining
BleedingHart187: haha yeah
WhothehellisPatN: only everyone looks at it and says kill whitey
BleedingHart187: theres a band called that
WhothehellisPatN: yeah me
BleedingHart187: haha no way
BleedingHart187: lifetimewarrenty was gunna play a show with them but codys mom wouldntlet us
-----------

Tue, 05 Apr 2005 21:55:19 GMT

sorry to update again..........

on a lighter noteee i got my hair cut, its outragous, but so lame

the ghey barber wouldnt shave the sides of my head tho, but ill do that whn the rest grows longer, i sweet from first to lasts guitarists hair so hXcthen i can hXc dance for real

just becuase im a ltitle bitch i will update again later tonigt

Tue, 05 Apr 2005 21:21:55 GMT

I never lied to you........

[Unless i had to i do what i got to]

Tue, 05 Apr 2005 18:55:55 GMT

[im the worst person in the world i probably embarrasssed u the whole time, but if i could go back, id fuck things up even worse than i did just to make you angry] today i felt better by lunch, even tho all morning there was a searing pain all the way thru me, lunch today was really awsome, its getting so nice outside. i cant wait for the weekend, shuld be cool. band practice, and saturday night i need to burn sum things, namly, 2 notes, 3 notebooks full of things about/to (but never sent) her, 1 atrocious yellow hat, and a cd with 27 ska songs on it ska....GROSS

so sherwood stock ..........sike im not goint to that shitt, those bands.. asx (about silence....x?)overrated
stimulate just sucks big vainy cock beltway alarms, have talent, but i dont like that kind of music, and i dont no the other bands

mellisa is cool, english is a cool class yeah

thank you

go fuck yourself

cuz no one else will

I HOPE THE NEXT BOY THAT YOU KISS HAS SOMTHING TERRIBLEY CONTAGIOUS ON HIS LIPS

Tue, 05 Apr 2005 03:41:11 GMT

caroline just shattered my heart all over the floor, i saw it coming, i dont know why i didnt save myself, its gunna be a long night, and tomorow will be the hadrest day, why todaydfjasdfklsdajf god today has been one of the worst days of my life dfjaskfj i cant do anything right, i cant even get a gf that gives a shit dsfkakive never had one that has called me, except for cancelling shit or breaking up with medsfkjasf s or if they want sumthingf dskfjs god i feel like i dont have anything to live for dfas now the whole harry relationship cycle starts over, i relize the one who I cared for with my life is a liar and every time i heard "i love you too" it was a lie straight to my face, now ill find another girl who seems to be a nice girl and doesnt think shes hot shit and isnt concited BUT SHE IS THERE ALL THE SAME AND UR A LYINGN WHORWE SDJKLFJASD;fsdkjfsl;a, if i could give back every kiss i would, if i could see u get every scar it would make me smile fjsdfklas omg i cant believe i let her in i am such an idioit i cant stop the tears, its uncontrolable i cant see any reason to even try. im not doing swim team this summer fuck that shit. i cant feel anything but ice it stings, it feels lke my heart has collapsed, i cant beleivfe i didnt get myself out of that situation sjkdfas;kl god so fucking lazy wouldnt even hangout with me wtf!?2! for the last 2 months of our 3 month relationship everytime i saw her she acted like it was her fucking job or a chore being with me but sumthing that confuses me

how can one day u say "o i cant wait to see u saturday"

then three days later its over

i hate how you hate me

I'm not wishing anymore
I'm not writing songs for you
I sleep better in the dark
I'm not doing this for you

This is because of you I don't believe
Tongue tied an institute of my relief
You're my, my reason to shame
(my reason to shame)

I'm not wishing anymore
I'm not writing songs for you
I sleep better in the dark
I'm not doing this for you

This is because of you I don't believe
Tongue tied an institute of my relief

i cant beleive just becuase i met someone i liked, i started to beleive again

i guess i was right before

there is no such thing as love, and if there is, its on a halmark card and ill never expeirience it

thank you

go fuck yourself

Thu, 24 Mar 2005 23:43:19 GMT

hmm so i really dont wanna go to florida, last time i went when i came back i lost everything, and the pain was so deep. i am so afraid of leaving. easter psh bullshit, i wish sumone would crucifi me.........FUCK GOD

fuck public eljay

Thu, 24 Mar 2005 23:20:47 GMT

EDIT i earased my freinds list, so if i freinded u and u dont really know me or read my junral that u dont, if i deleted u and i do know u, recomment and ill readd u

Thu, 24 Mar 2005 23:10:03 GMT

Thirteen random things you like:
01) music
02) writing poems
03) coke
04) freidns
05) playing guitar
06) taking pictures
07) the rain
08) car rides
09) fridays
10) doing somthing no one thinks you'll do
11) music
12) honesty
13) laughing

Twelve good bands/artists:
01) taking back sunday
02) from first to last
03) Underoath
04) Thursday
05) rolling stones
06) funeral for a freind
07) senses fail
08) hidden in plain view
09) from autumn to ashes
10) Brand New
11) silverstien
12) rancid

Eleven movies:
01) Ghost World
02) nightmare before xmas
03) spongebob well not really this is just the first thing that came to mind
04) Napoleon Dynamite
05) The Ring
06) the grudge
07) clerks
08) anchor man
09) the godfather
10) donnie darko
11) Old Skool

Ten friends:

01) tom
02) jen
03) jake
04) Michelle
05) john (gigioli)
06) pat (from shs)
07) caroline
08) melissa
09) jorge
10) chris

Nine favorite foods/drinks:
01) pizza
02) coke
03) coke again
04) cinnamon toast crunch
05) muffins
06) pizza
07) waffles
08) french fries
09) potatos

Eight things you wear daily:
01) jeans
02) t shirt
03) belt
04) key chain
05) button
06) hat
07) shoes
08) sox

Seven things that annoy you:
01) boredom
02) liars
03) liars
04) liars
05) kids who think there "punk" for liking the distillers/newfound glory/blink 182/ or
06) when i bend over backwards for people and see nothing
07) people who are just to lazy to care

Six things you touch everyday:
01) myself
02) toothbrush
03) notebook
04) pencil
05) Cd player
06) the floor

Five shows you watch:
01) simpsons
02) Family Guy
03) music videos on indemand
04)
05)

Four qualities you like about a person:
01) honest
02) nice
03) likes being with me/talking to me
04) willing to hang out

Three things you have eaten today:
01) pizza
02) coke
03) coke

Two people on Journal that you have kissed: (on journal= people on live journal?)
01) umm i dont think anyone would like me to divulge that i have kised them so i wont like humiliate anyone
02)

One person you could spend the rest of your life with (not necessarily in marriage):
01) harry byrne...

Thu, 24 Mar 2005 04:25:56 GMT

today was great, now i feel kind of like an asshole i really fkdlsjfaskl;dfjasef fuck i cant do anything right

Wed, 23 Mar 2005 02:29:02 GMT

hahah what an awsome guy the end

Tue, 22 Mar 2005 20:31:50 GMT

school was so lame, it was very boring

math- hmm didnt do anyth just chilled

health- totally boring becuase jen wasnt there today, had a test it was so easy

guitar- ah god its gotten so boring, wrote sum shit though, good stuff

nsl- haha we never do anything

lunch- i got raped by that kid mikey it was umm yeah :(

spanish- eh just sat there and mr gonzalez was talking and sum kid said "im gunna throw up" and i laughed and know one else did, i dont think anyone noticed though so i wasnt embarassed

english- sleptttttttt

biology- chilled with dustin

me and hoon on culture day

bLaNkSk8eR41: haha did u like them indians
bLaNkSk8eR41: lol
BleedingHart187: hahhahaha
BleedingHart187: no
BleedingHart187: haha
bLaNkSk8eR41: hahaha
BleedingHart187: hahah did u c that little spanish boy?
bLaNkSk8eR41: aahahahahaha
bLaNkSk8eR41: yea duuddee]
BleedingHart187: yeah i hope his dfad beats him
bLaNkSk8eR41: HAHAHAHA
bLaNkSk8eR41: with his drumsticks
bLaNkSk8eR41: lol..
BleedingHart187: haha
BleedingHart187: breaks his anlkes and says "for the last time!!! its step SLIDE step step"
bLaNkSk8eR41: dude i asm fuckin psyched rite now we gotta jam fuckin soon dude
BleedingHart187: i know right
BleedingHart187: i hated how for american culture they had the rappers
bLaNkSk8eR41: fuckin shit dude
bLaNkSk8eR41: dat b;lack dude on da set
bLaNkSk8eR41: omg...
bLaNkSk8eR41: disgrace...
BleedingHart187: yeah i no he sucked
BleedingHart187: and sumones gotta teach tidre how to use a mic
BleedingHart187: like all i heard out of him was like cracks and every now and then id hear a bitch or a hoe or a get krunk but that was about it
bLaNkSk8eR41: aahahaha
bLaNkSk8eR41: fuckin seriously
bLaNkSk8eR41: get sum mc's up there
BleedingHart187: i know right
bLaNkSk8eR41: they dont no music
bLaNkSk8eR41: and they try making up rhyming words cuz they cant rap
BleedingHart187: yeah like
BleedingHart187: tack and yack

Mon, 21 Mar 2005 23:38:59 GMT

wow i love this song

"The Leaving Song Pt. 2"

Don't waste your touch, you won't feel anything
Or were you sent to save me?
I've thought too much, you won't find anything...
Worthy of redeeming

Yo he estado aquí muchas veces antes y regreso

To... break down, and cease all feeling
Burn now, what once was breathing
Reach out, and you may take my heart away

Imperfect cry, and scream in ecstasy
So what befalls the flawless?
Look what I've built (Please don't do this),
It shines so beautifully (Why won't you look at me?)
Now watch as it destroys me

Y regreso aquí otra vez y comienzo

To... break down, and cease all feeling
Burn now, what once was breathing
Reach out, and you may take my heart away

Break down, and cease all feeling
Burn now, what once was breathing
Reach out, and you may take my heart away

I left it all behind, and never said goodbye
I left it all behind, and never said goodbye
I left it all behind, and never said goodbye
I left it all to die

I saw its birth, I watched it grow
I felt it change me
I took the life, I ate it slow
Now it consumes me

I... break down, and cease all feeling
Burn now, what once was breathing
Reach out, and you may take my heart away

Break down, and cease all feeling
Burn now, what once was breathing
Reach out, and you may take my heart away
... Heart away

Mon, 21 Mar 2005 20:49:14 GMT

school today was so lame. really really boring. haha im so concieted its not even funny, i have the hugest ego its really kidn of sad how self indulged and selfish i really am. god im so awfull im so mad at myself right now god im so awfull and i love being ignored yeah thats great

eh survery i guess? i kpet sum of jeffs answers cuz they were the same as mione or funny

Layer One - Stats...
-- Name: harryy
-- Birthplace: boston, ma

-- Eye Color: ...?
-- Hair Color: brown
-- Righty or Lefty: Righty
Layer Two - Describe...
-- Your heritage: irish
-- Your weakness: my huge gross fucking ego
-- Your fears: being alone
-- Goal you'd like to achieve: be happy
Layer Three - Tell..
-- Your best physical feature: none
-- Your greatest accomplishment: none
-- Your most missed memory: the ignorance of some things in the world u had as a child that kept u happy
Layer Four - You prefer...
-- Pepsi or Coke: coke
-- McDonald's or Burger King: neither
-- Single or group dates: Single
-- Adidas or Nike: adidas
-- Chocolate or vanilla: i dont give a shit
Layer Five - Do you...?
-- Smoke: Nope
-- Cuss: sumtimes
-- Sing well: i wish
-- Have a crush(es): i guess u could say that sorta
-- Like high school: hahahah fuck no
Play an instrument: guitar/bass
Layer Six - In the past, did/have you...
-- Drank alcohol: No
-- Smoke(d): No
-- Have Sex: no
-- Made Out: yep
-- Been dumped: yep
-- Stolen anything: yep
Layer eight - Opposite sex
-- Best eye color? greenish but it really doesnt matter
-- Best hair color? dark, but again it really doesnt matter
-- Short or long hair?: long, but that doesnt matter either
-- Best height: shorter than me if ur a girl who is taller than me i dont wanna talk to u (im gunna keep jeffs answer here haha)
-- Best articles of clothing: dont care
Layer nine - Number of...
-- people I have kissed in my life: 9 or 10
-- girl(boy)friends: 1 real...5 crap (kept jeffs answer cuz its same as mine)
-- drugs taken illegally: 0
-- people I could trust with my life: 1
-- CDs that I own: alot
-- piercing: none
-- scars on my body: a few

Sun, 20 Mar 2005 18:19:43 GMT

so this weekend has been ok, friday was really awsome, school was so tite, and i got to see caroline which was awsome, i also saw danielle wich wasnt. saturday i had a swim meet, i swam 100 free, 200 IM, and 200 fly, 200 fly i got 5th out of the entire meet, there were like fuckin 2oo people there it was pretty suh-weet. these people kept making fun of my hat though, so i think im just gunna either shave my head like i did in the summer, or get a new hat, i havnt decided yet, im just so sick of people making fun of it, i guess u win. today=swimmet part 2 and then fucking having a god damn cheese burger becuase i fucking want to, o today this morning/last night i had the most insanse dream, it was so crazy i was all like on a bus, and i had a ziptie around my ankles and i was "arrested" or sumthing, and i was in this huge city, and on street corners there were these really deep pits and people were hanging off of buildings donw into them, by chains on there wrists and necks, and people on the street were yelling, spiting and throwing things at them, the city was like full of poverty and huge buildings, and like polution out the ass, anf the only car type of thing i could see was the bus and police cars, everyone else was walking, and it was crowded as fuck, so eventually i get off the bus, and jim in line with all these other people who have zip ties on there ankles, and as we were walking down the street, the police are taking a few people every block or so and chaining them up, so i left, i just hoped away, and went intio this building, and i found in my pocket one of those nail file things off of the nail clippers, and i cut the zip tie off, of one foot, then i saw a cop cart stop outside the building i was in, so i took my shoe off of the one foot with the ziptie left, and left the shoe and zip tie in a bush, (yeah there was a bush inside, and i ran, then i woke up,it was so crazy,................................................................. then i went to 1045 mass it was so long and boring and ghey and lame

Sat, 19 Mar 2005 17:13:58 GMT

1* First grade teacher's name: uhh

2* Last word you said: thanks

3* Last song you sang: from autumn to ashes-miligram smile

4* Last person you hugged: iono

5* Last thing you laughed at: iono

6* Last time you said I dont remember: 2 seconds ago

7* Last time you cried: wensday i think

9* What color socks are you wearing: white

10* What's under your bed?: nothing, bed=matress

11* What time did you wake up today: 11:30

12* Current taste: coke

13* Current song?: not answering that cuz its embarrassing cuz i always say i dont like this band haha

15* Current annoyance: people making fun of me, people talking about me and not wanting me to hear when there right in front of me, people saying things they dont want me to hear when there right in front of me, people making fun of my hat

16* Current longing: acceptance

17* Current desktop background: Gir....dancing

18* Current worry: errrr

19* Current hate: people

20* Current favorite article of clothing: thrice shirt

21* Favorite physical feature of the preferred secks: eyes

22* Last CD that you listened to: from autumn to ashes-to bad your beutifull

23* Favorite place to be: band practice

24* Least favorite place: around people i dont know, cuz when im around people i dont know well im ridicoulously shy

25* Time you wake up in the morning: 5/530

26* If you could play an instrument: i can

27* Favorite color: grey, black, red

28* Do you believe in an afterlife?: yeah, not heaven or hell though

29* How tall are you: 6'

30* Current favorite word/saying: fuckin (idioit), dont look at me, (thats a) (god) damn (straight) (right)(lie) (it), shiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit, ka-ka-ka-ka (haha orchestra assembly thing)

31* Favorite book: to kill a mocking bird

32* Favorite season: Spring or fall

33* One person from your past you wish you could go back and talk to: lija.. i guess, only becuase i want to cuss her out

36* What is your career going to be like: i wanna be a lawyer, or music producer, cuz its not likely that i will be in a signed band

37* How many kids do you want: 2 or less

*HAVE YOU EVER...

* 39* Said "I love you" and meant it: Yeah

40* Gotten in a fight with your dog/cat/bird/fish: no

41* Been to New York: Nope

42* Been to Florida: yeah

43* Been to California: Nope

44* Been to Hawaii: Nope

45* Been to Mexico: Nope

46* Been to China: Nope

48* Dreamed something really crazy and then it happened the next day: No

52* Do you have a crush on someone: sure i guess lol

53* What book are you reading now?: davinci code

54* Red or blue?: red

55* What is the first thing you think when you wake in the morning?: I hate school

56* How many rings before you answer: huh

58* Future son's name: psh duh samantha

59* What do you sleep with?: nothing

61* Wish were here: uh?

63* Piercings: i want them

*THE ECKSTRA STUFF*

64* Do you do drugs: Nope

65* Do you drink: nope

67* What kind of Shampoo and Conditioner do you use: Whatevers in there.

68* What are you most scared of: Loosing people close to me

69* What clothes do you sleep in: boxers and a tshirt

70* Who is the last person that called you: michelle

71* Where do you want to get married: don't know

72* If you could change anything about yourself what would that be: My weight, my hair, my whole face and head, umm everything

73* Who do you really hate: alot of people

74* Been In Love: hmm

75* Are you timely or always late: iono

76* Do you have a job: no, im taking a life guard course when i get back from florida thoughj

77* Do you like being around people: not alot of people, like 3 or 4, if its more then im usually quiet, and if i dont know one of them very well i dont talk like at all

78* Best feeling in the world: Being loved

*80* Are you a health freak: No

81* Do you have a "Type" of person you always go after: no

82* Do you want someone you don't have?: no

83* Are you lonely right now: no

84* Ever afraid you'll never get married: dont really care

85* Do you want to get married?: dont reallt care

86* Do you want kids?:maybe like 2

*IN THE LAST 48 HOURS, HAVE YOU...*

87* Cried: hmm no

* Bought Something: yeah

89* Gotten Sick: yea

90* Sang: yes

91* Said I Love You: iono, maybe

92* Wanted To Tell Someone You Loved them: probly

93* Met Someone: yeah hahaha then i i walked away and tripped over a little kid

94* Moved On: no

95* Talked To Someone: yes

96* Had A Serious Talk: maybe

97* Missed Someone: no

98* Hugged Someone: yes

99* Yelled at Someone: yes

100* Dreamed About Someone You Can't Be With: no

AND...another one Bold the ones that apply to you.

01. I have a cell phone

02. I'm obsessed with new things.

03. I'm the youngest child.

04. I am a shopoholic.

05. I love my gauged ears.

06. I love wearing a lot of black eyeliner

07. I love Daquiris.

08. I love the weekends.

09. I can't live without lipgloss.

10. I can't live without music.

11. I lived in Tahoe.

12. I spend money I have.

13. I'll be in college for over 4 years.

14. I love designer handbags

15. I get annoyed easily.

16. I eventually want kids.

17. I like the Backsreet Boys.

18. I have more than a couple horrible memories.

19. I'm addicted to Degrassi.

20. I am a person.

21. My first kiss was unexpected.

22. I start school on Jan 4th or 5th

23. I love taking pictures.

24. I hate girls who are fake.

25. I can be mean when I want to.

26. My dreams are bizzare.

27. I am bisexual.

28. I have way too many pairs of shoes.

29. I've seen "She's All That".

30. I dress how I feel that day.

31. I love Charmed.

32. Sometimes I cry for almost no reason.

33. I hate when people are ridiculously late.

34. I procrastinate.

35. Winter is my least favorite season.

36. I have too many clothes for my closet/dresser.

37. I love to sleep.

38. I wish I were smarter.

40. I have a lot of drama

41. No one knows my full story of my life......i think everyone can bold this though

42. I love my hair.

43. I fight with my parents.

44. I love the beach!!!

45. I have had the chicken pox.

46. I'm excited for the future.

47. I can't control my emotions.

48. I can't wait till New Year's.

49. I love the show 'Rich Girls'

50. I love my friends.

51. Christmas is my favorite holiday

52. I can be very insecure sometimes.

53. I have had a broken bone.

54. I hate ignorant people.

55. I love my laptop.

56. I love guys/girls that play the guitar.

57. I state the obvious.

58. I'm a happy person sometimes

59. I love to dance.

60. I love to sing.

61. I hate cleaning my room.

62. I tend to get jealous very easily.

63. I like to play video games.

64. I love John mayer

65. I hate when I see animals/people getting hurt/abused.

66. I'm a vegetarian/vegan/don't eat beef.

67. I don't like to study for tests.

68. I love Play-Doh.

69. I am too forgiving.

70. I have a good sense of direction.

71. I like high school.

72. I have a talent of sweet talking my way out of things.

73. I don't drink enough to get drunk.

74. I love kisses on the forehead.

75. I love the color blue

76. I don't sew.

77. I am not addicted to drugs.

78. I love the Olsen twins.

80. I become stressed easily.

81. I hate liars.

82. I like comfy sweatpants.

83. Bam Margera is hot.

84. I love the smell of fresh laundry.

85. I love my family.

86. I don't mind getting shots.

87. I am a perfectionist when it comes to certain things.

88. I always wanted to learn to play the drums.

89. I hate the feeling of failure.

90. I am still a virgin.

91. I would love to have my own fashion line.

92. I can be quite selfish.

93. I still act like a little kid.

94. Above all, I despise dishonesty.

95. I can stay on the computer forever

96. I love music.

97. I wish I was more motivated when it comes to school.

98. I love getting stuff in the mail.

99. I have problems letting go of people.

100. I hate the feeling of being alone

Fri, 18 Mar 2005 22:25:50 GMT

today was really cool.

math- didnt do anything, just kinda chilled, best math class ive stayed awake for all semester

health-bagels today so i didnt eat and i chileld and talked to jake and jen, then we wached a movie about ecstacy it was kinda scary, and really depressing

guitar-really really really lame, except i detuned chris wisors guitar so every string sounded the exact same

nsl- we had to retake the whole test we had yestrday becuase mr nutter lost them, i did so well yestrday and i think i did bad today

lunch-ha nothing, except i looked at a sculpture michelle made in her art thngy it was cool

spanish- did nothing, i was late but this crazy guy "had my back" crazy kids

english- i had to write a short stryong using like 40 vocab words.....natrally i wrote about gil the unsuccessful salesman

biology- o god this was crazy, me dustin and this girl named jamie were in a group type thing for a project, and dustin had this viagra pen, and whn u pushed a button it got longer it was so funny. and there was this crazy looking girl who kept like blowing pieces of ripped up paper out of a roleld up peice of paper becuase it was her bday or sumthing haha it was insane thats about it and dustin jen and tom saw slipknot and lamb of god! i want to see them!!

BleedingHart187: sup jen
Slayerrr325: hey harr
Slayerrr325: nohitn muchh yo
Slayerrr325: u
BleedingHart187: same
BleedingHart187: bout to take a shower
BleedingHart187: updating eljay

Slayerrr325: awesome u shoudl put jen says hi in it

Slayerrr325: i have a paper cut on my finger i dont rember getting it
Slayerrr325: its deep
Slayerrr325: and it sucks
BleedingHart187: maybe its goffers
BleedingHart187: or u have termites
Slayerrr325: no
Slayerrr325: i scare goffers away
BleedingHart187: how tho
Slayerrr325: bc onece when i was little i tried to pet one and it ran away sooo goffers hate my vagina
Slayerrr325: it sucks
Slayerrr325: chyeahh no comment to that
Slayerrr325: haha
BleedingHart187: can i put that in my eljay to
Slayerrr325: haha sure harry
Slayerrr325: today chris said he was gonna drop his pants when he got off the bus and say "OH shitt!" real fast and pick em up...i missd it ...boo
BleedingHart187: b ooo!

Fri, 18 Mar 2005 00:03:24 GMT

ahh god im so angry today was ok. but right now i feel so miserable, it couldnt be more tru though, ive been in maryland for four years, everyone who i have become freinds with since the day i got here until september of 2004 hates me now, wont even hang out with me, except for one. out of four years of trying, the fifth time around, all i have to show or it is 1 person, this is excluding the 3 people at sherwood who are freinds with me. and this depresses my in everyway i can imagine. today some guy robbed a bank, he said he had a bomb, it made ms smile, part of me wanted him to set t off, if it was real, im not saying i want to die, becuase i dont thats just stupid. but theres nothing that would make me happier, to see all those fucks at shs burn and die, all the sluts, druggies, that kid in my spanihs class who said he wanted to go on a pub tour........everyone in my spanish class everyone whos called me gay, everyone who has made fun of me, everyone who has made fun of my hat(s), all those bitches who have nothing nice to say, everyone who laughs at me when i trip, everyone who laughs when i studder while speaking out to a class, everyone who laughs at me for just being me. nothing id love more than to wach them all burn and die and rot and watch there families (if there families even give a fuck about them, i dont see how anyone could ever love them, but then again, who could love me?) cry and id laugh and take pleasure in it, id die to see that. god i dont even know why i botherd with that, know one reads this, except tom and jen ha

......

HAVE U EVER FELT LIKE EVERYTHING POSITIVE SOMEONE IS TELLING YOU IS A FUCKING LIE?

im sure you have, i hate that feeling

Thu, 17 Mar 2005 20:32:57 GMT

psh st patricks day my ass. so today i had like 342742783042 tests, anf ran over a little girl by accidnet, ill talk about today later

Wed, 16 Mar 2005 18:01:54 GMT

Anything is what she is
Anywhere is where she's from
Anything is what she'll be
Anything as long as it's mine

And the door it opens is the way back in
Or is it the way back out?

Anyplace is where she'll be
Anyplace, she'll see you from
Lies and secrets become your world
Anytime, anywhere she takes me away

And death climbs up the steps one by one
To give you the rose that's been burnt by her son

Point me to the sky above
I can't get there on my own
Walk me through the graveyard
Dig up her bones

I have seen the demon's face
I have heard of her death place
I fall down on my knees in praise of the
Horrible things that took her away

And death climbs up the steps one by one
To give you the rose that's been burnt by her son

Point me to the sky above
I can't get there on my own
Walk me through the graveyard
Dig up her bones

amazing

so check my xanga

http://www.xanga.com/home.aspx?user=Die_yung_Save_urself187

Sun, 13 Mar 2005 23:52:05 GMT

hmm today and this whole weekend i felt like shit, except for saturday night, i was very happy saturday it was really awsome. o got to see pat and we watched anchor man, and his freind alena was there it was good times, today i chilled with tom, and i still am, but i still feel like shit, but its good to see tom

heres the acuostic song ive been working on, almost complete

Tell me everything
That you want to hear
I'll hang off every word
And cry you all of my tears
I spill my heart
Just for you my dear
So let me whisper in your ear
Words of love, and words of fear

Love is just a single tear
Shed by those with the deepest fears
Holding your hand
And holding you near
I'll give you my heart
To wear on your sleave
And i'll try not to cry
When i see you leave

He will tell you
All you want to hear
I'll listen from outside
And shed my bitter tears
Im such a sucker for a liar
Just like you my dear
i know you ignore these words
that i whisper in your ear

Love is just a single tear
Shed by those with the deepest fears
Holding your hand
And holding you near
I'll give you my heart
To wear on your sleave
And i'll try not to cry
When i see you leave

But theres a whole in my heart
Deaper than the distance between us

Love is just a single tear
Shed by those with the deepest fears
Holding your hand
And holding you near
I'll give you my heart
To wear on your sleave
And i'll try not to cry
When i see you leave

knowones herd the guitar except for jen and tom, its pretty bad, but ill work on it as much as i can

hahah shaun, shaun=asain girl that i couldnt resist to be an asshole to

Sun, 13 Mar 2005 19:19:58 GMT

BleedingHart187: helllllloo0oi0o0o00o0o0io
wOnToNsOUp627: hi
BleedingHart187: how are you darling
wOnToNsOUp627: ummmm im alright i spose
wOnToNsOUp627: u
BleedingHart187: dandy
BleedingHart187: almost eh?
wOnToNsOUp627: ya
BleedingHart187: so is the icon killing himself? orwhat?
wOnToNsOUp627: NEVER
wOnToNsOUp627: not at all
wOnToNsOUp627: hes jus trying to fly duh
BleedingHart187: i have an offer you cant refuse
wOnToNsOUp627: what is it
BleedingHart187: im gunna throw it out on the table
BleedingHart187: and if u dont like it
BleedingHart187: send it right back at me, alright?
wOnToNsOUp627: ok
BleedingHart187: me and u.....
BleedingHart187: arts and crafts
BleedingHart187: right now
wOnToNsOUp627: hahahaha
wOnToNsOUp627: ok
wOnToNsOUp627: so what kind are we going to do
BleedingHart187: well start of with some macoroni art
wOnToNsOUp627: awesome
wOnToNsOUp627: adnthen can we finger paint
BleedingHart187: then move onto some finger paintings of a house on a hill with a cliche looking sun

and thats the end of that chapter (throws scarf over neck)